Dating in Los Angeles, Part Two

The last few months have involved my actively dating again. Not one person in particular, mind, but many people. I'm still not sure how I like it, but it's not the worst thing in the world. There have been a number of mediocre instances and so far only one bad date, but the rest of it has been rather peachy. Entertaining. I've made a new friend. And in all that I haven't screwed anyone over, that I know of. Bonus points for me.

The other night I met up with a guy in West LA. I took the Orange Line to the Red Line to a Rapid bus and walked the rest of the way to his place. The route was a little out of the way but wasn't impossible to bear, mainly because I had a thick book for school to tear apart on the way. But I did compare the route to the time of day involved in getting there (he lives alongside the 405), and without a vehicle I went very much out of the way in order to get there. I'll have to check again because we met up later in the evening, but I believe that I could have taken the 761 - which goes on the 405 - a fair share of the way there.

This is just me pondering and wondering about better planning. One of the many reasons I'm glad I'm looking around for a car is because I am making these comparisons. These comparisons lead me to wonder why anyone in any place of authority thinks it beneficial to have such indirect ways of service in a city that is so spread out to begin with. The time of day shouldn't matter. In fact, I had a conversation with someone just yesterday about who thought it was a good idea to have some lines stop service at an obscure time, like 7:23 in the evening or something.

Metro, you've raised your fares and have cut your lines. I'm tired of asking, but I'll ask again without the million details: where is the benefit in this maneuver? Who really is benefiting? You have greatly emphasized the issue of class, and perhaps race, and tax bracket in the way that you have chosen to operate... a statement that is best for another post for another time, but still needs saying. Someone must think it's funny. But it's not.

Anyway, on a more positive note and to tie in the overall theme, I need to enter a little math into the love-connection equation---

All of my 'interesting' (loosely-termed) dates have been from online dating site OkCupid. The ones where I could see the end from the beginning. The ones I'll be writing a book about.

However, the ones where I actually got somewhere, I met the guy in real life. This most recent one I met at a party. Now, granted I found out about the party through friends online, but still. I'm more at a position where I can see the second date from the next block, and not a mile away. Perhaps. Maybe. Who dares know? (Rhetorical question.)

I really don't think I'm cut for online dating, but I won't rule it out entirely. There are some kinks to work out - such as, first of all, how willing am I to date so actively in general. I've got great people in my life and I'm okay with being single. That and I don't like the idea of going through a million people, but I guess that's where the whole needle-in-a-haystack imagery comes from. Pearl in an oyster, maybe?

I've made a few other good connections via OkCupid - including but not limited to a guy who wants to make a bikini for me to wear to the beach this weekend (long story, but kind of cute) - that, perhaps, having a car in due time will make easier to jolt, at least on my end.

Perhaps. It's just a thought.

The Only Girl

Last night, New Guy, his friend and I went on a Midnight Ridazz ride around Lake Balboa, and once again I was the only girl in the group. I didn't mind, not really, but it's just funny that it happens to be that way more often than not. I really don't mind being surrounded by men.

I'm having fun with New Guy. He's cute, gentlemanly, and has the makings of a decent person. He actually checked out this ride because I'd mentioned it to him on our first date. But if anything right now, things are being taken slowly - and, similarly, I don't mind. Not really. It's nice to not be pressured into being ooey-gooey sticky sweet right away, or to break out the lingerie because we're at the three "non-date" mark. But it's also nice to be able to message back and forth/bitch about online dating with someone. Did I mention that he's cute? And my age?

Let me tell you, though, it's really nice when a guy takes an interest with something that you like. He's been all over this for the last couple of weeks. Take notes, guys - that's really, really cool.

Whatever happens, though, it's a little 'comforting' to know that if ever things go south I can hop on a bicycle ride like this and literally be surrounded by guys. Turn on the laugh and the smile, arch the back, and there you go; it's almost natural. I met four guys last night that fit the friend role really well (sans benefits, mind you), if not the romantic partnership I'm kindasorta looking for. Which I believe if I'm looking for won't happen, but that's a wholly different entry for a completely different blog.

Everyone was biking to a nearby bar by the time the ride was over... it had been a long day, otherwise I would have joined the rest of them; besides, New Guy and his friend were headed home because they had to be up early the next day. Depending on how things go by next week will determine if I join them or not, though.

Happy hunting cycling~

A Worthy Distraction

(A brief look into a bright section of my evening that has something to do with being car-less in Los Angeles, if not entirely. Phrases/words have been bolded for purposes of relevance.)

On the Orange Line this evening, while on the way home from a free concert at Pershing Square, I met an adorable 26-year-old Ecuadorian doctor. He plays guitar, which is what sparked our conversation. I asked if he's tried playing piano. He said, no, it's far too difficult. My observation is that those who play guitar find it difficult to play piano, and those who play piano find it difficult to play guitar. I mentioned that I've played piano since I was three years old and can't imagine playing guitar. Cute. Glasses. Scruff. Nice hands.

I told him I take the bus and ride my bicycle nearly everywhere. We empathized on the idea that getting from one place to another is challenging without a car, but it's nice travelling by bicycle. Good for the legs. He doesn't mind taking public transportation, but at times minds the wait and the over-planning. I told him that it's likely that I'll have a car in six to eight months or so, but even then I won't see the need to drive it every day. Why every day, when you live in Los Angeles? (Talking more weather than actual commute, to be honest. Of course it all depends.)

He's so darned cute. He'll be leaving in two months. Still, the idea of two months is a decent enough distraction. Of course we exchanged numbers. There will either be coffee in the future, or I may never see him again. Who knows? Who cares? All that matters is that I walked home from my stop at Balboa Station with a lighter step than I have in months.

Dating in Los Angeles

In case it wasn't painfully obvious, I am a single twenty-something in Los Angeles.

For the time I have been single I guess you can say I've enjoyed it - at least in the sense of not yet being married or having children. I like getting to know people with the potential of a relationship more so than not - as far as that's been concerned, however, it's been rather hit or miss. Some efforts have resulted in dates. Others have resulted in purely physical relationships. Every now and then, though, I'm surprised to get waist-deep in that "getting to know someone" phase with someone I'm super excited about. Like anyone else would, I go for chest-deep, then chin-, then eyeballs-deep. Sadly, whether a native or a transplant, Los Angeles is full of flakes. Dates can be fun. Slimy rejection after concerted effort... mmm, not so much. It's only then that I tend to go back to square negative one - a place where I'm not really a fan of being single anymore.

However, seeing as I live for the thrill of the gamble, my friends suggested I try one of two things: OkCupid (I've had an account for a long time; re-started a few weeks ago), and going out and just being around people, with no real aim to hook up or find someone. I've fallen into relationships that way before. So naturally I've been doing both.

Oddly enough, I've been able to meet a lot of people on account that I ride my bicycle and make use of public transportation in LA. It has made for some alarmingly interesting inquiries and overall conversation. I've also met a few people while riding my bicycle on rides arranged by the folks over at Midnight Ridazz. It's actually only then when I don't mind guys saying things in my direction while on my bicycle, being that the ratio of women to men on such rides is generally pretty low. If that's not enough motivation to go on more group rides, I don't know what is.

Everyone wants to feel special. No one wants to feel cheated or lied to. Such are the things we deal with when putting ourselves out on the line, and in reality we're all capable of being the latter to someone else. Sure, I'm totally adding fuel to the fiery topic of dating/attaining relationships and the politics involved, but I guess part of me is also sending a message to the universe: which mainly is to keep jerks disguised as nice guys at bay this go-round.

But first I think I'll need a better radar.